16 Week Baby Bump

Ok...well actually it maybe a little bigger then a bump but here it is anyway. For those who think I look big for 16w please remember I have 2 babies in there :-). It has been fun to watch and see my stomach grow. I catch Chad from time to time just staring at my stomach...if he didn't have such a sweet look on his face when he was doing it I may be getting a bit self conscious but from the look he has I know it makes him happy :-). I had my first "your expecting" comment from a stranger last week. Which actually surprised me as I was wearing a loose fitting t-shirt as Chad and I had just finished our evening walk through the neighborhood. It was nice though to know that I actually look pregnant to someone instead of just fat. I have a feeling to most people I just look a little thick in the middle unless I am wearing a fitted shirt...but I know my day is coming that I look huge to everyone so I am not rushing it :-).

Sweet Friends

We finally broke the news to our local friends and some at our Squadrons. I figured I should share w/ the girls in my Stamper Six group as they were coming over on Thursday for our monthly meeting and my stomach is getting big enough that it is hard to camouflage. My Stamper Six group is just a group of 6 girls and we get together once a month and I teach them new techniques each month so that they can go home and make their own pretty cards and other projects (really it is just an excuse for girl time :-) ). So anyway they were coming over so I thought now is probably a good time to tell them. One of the girls works in my Squadron, so I sent her an email and Oh MY Goodness was she excited for us...from what I hear she went and told everyone and anyone who would listen. People told her she was so excited that they would have assumed it was her daughter who was pregnant. Of course she knows our story and our struggles along the way and not very many people at work do, so that explains her excitement....anyway...I am glad I am not working there anymore...I would be so embarrassed...I am not one to be out there w/ everything (especially w/ my co-workers), I like to keep things to myself a little more but her excitement for us is very sweet but that is not really the sweetest thing...She brought a very yummy ice cream cake to our Stamper Six meeting w/ one of my favorite ice creams. YUMMY!!!!! It was such a sweet treat from a sweet friend. It was vanilla cake w/ chocolate peanut butter buckeye ice cream. A pregnant girls dream come true :-). Speaking of chocolate I was happy to read in my Fit Pregnancy magazine that women who ate chocolate at least 5 x a week were less likely to develop preeclampsia. Unfortunately I am sure a snickers bar doesn't count...they probably mean a small piece of dark chocolate but chocolate is chocolate and I will take what I can get (now I have an excuse to eat it) :-).

From There to Here (And other fun stuff)

I feel like we should fill in the blanks a little...maybe not completely necessary but it is a good way for us to document our journey. There was a lot that went on for us from the time of our post in Feb until our next post in July. First, we had to decide if we wanted to venture down the IVF road again and let me tell you it was not an easy decision for us. We decided that for us we would feel better if we had a little bit of a financial cushion so we decided to go away for Walter Reeds program and to Shady Grove which has a top notch Shared Risk program as well as wonderful success rates. It proved to be a great decision (not only because now we know the end result) mostly because the medical care we received was excellent. It appears after the fact that Walter Reed may have been a little cavalier in letting my estrogen levels get too high...as a matter of fact my doctor at Shady Grove was a little disturbed at how high the let me levels get. In addition to looking for a.) a better program b.) a little more financial security I also wanted to get additional testing done prior to going through another cycle. My concern was having fluid in my tubes...I had read that if you have blocked tubes you can end up w/ fluid in them that can actually kill the embryos once they are transferred. So I wanted to get a clear answer on this before we proceeded. Dr. Chang agreed that this was a good idea. So I head to DC on my own while Chad was deployed to get all the routine exams done that they require in order to approve someone for Shared Risk as well as an additional test called an HSG...basically they shot dye through your tubes and take pictures this is normally how they would diagnose someone having blocked tubes and I am sure many other abnormalities. Much to my surprise when I was having this test done the doctor looked at me a little perplexed and said "both of your tubes are open and you have both your right and left tubes"...imagine my surprise as my surgery report that I have from last year clearly states "absent rt ovary and tube" and "blocked left tube". Normally this would be good news but after 2.5 years of infertility, failed treatments and a failed IVF cycle not to mention all the waiting in between...it really wasn't happy news. It was very confusing, and very frustrating news. It was hard sharing the news w/ Chad as he didn't take it too well either plus the fact that he was deployed and not really to do much. This news didn't really change anything as far as our treatment went...it basically just changed our diagnosis from "Tubal Factor" to "Unexplained"...yes the dreaded unexplained infertility. Anyway it was a tough trip from start to finish...flt got canceled, was diverted into a different airport, luggage went to original airport, took 12 hrs to fly to DC when it should have taken 4 from start to finish but despite the speed bumps along the way it was a successful trip and we were approved for the Shared Risk program...now we just had to wait for Chad to get home. Originally we had planned to travel to DC in May for our first round of IVF w/ Shady Grove but that fell through and we ended up rescheduling for July...which turned out to be perfect timing (as God's timing always is).

For Inquiring Minds (questions we get a lot when we tell people our news)
- Are we going to find out what we are having? Yes
- Do we have names picked out? Kind of...we are pretty sure on one girl name and have half of
a boys name but we have a lot of work to do in this department...I figured we would wait
until we find out what we are having so we don't waste effort
- Nursery Ideas? We love the stuff at Restoration Hardware, just not sure which one yet
- How am I feeling? Great!!!!! A little morning sickness from weeks 9-11 and then again week
13 but all in all I cant complain, it hasn't been too bad. The worse thing for me is my energy
level...I am tired all the time.
- Cravings? Not really, other then normal routine stuff...this week it is brownies :-)...I know I
I need to stay away from the junk but I feel a little here and there wont hurt :-)

Chad:
I have to tell everyone how cute he is :-)
- He made me laugh when we were on our way to our first u/s he kept saying that we were going
to go get the "kids picture taken" which may not be that original to everyone else but I had
never heard anyone refer to an u/s this way...I thought it was cute :-)
- Every time I complain about a symptom he comes back about an 1 -2 hours later and will tell
why my back is already hurting or why I am having so many pains/cramps...he will go an look
it up on the Internet...too cute
- He is very protective and wont let me lift anything...including the dogs...which I miss picking up
Nashie...so I have to get on the floor if I want to cuddle w/ him
- Though I have called him Dad for the boys so many times since we have got the dogs over 4
years ago...I have to tell you that when we were at the u/s on Tuesday and the lady said to
Chad...."Dad, you are going to have to get over here if you want to see the screen" it made my
heart skip a beat...the hear Chad referred to as "dad" from someone else in this context was
a really neat moment for me.

Needless to say we are very, very, very, very excited and overwhelmed w/ joy...so much so that neither of us have slept very well the past 2 nights. We feel so Blessed and are so incredibly thankful for the Blessings God has given us.

Our true miracle continues to unfold before our eyes...it's been less than 100 calendar days since they began their journey of life, but already a lifetime worth of amazement found in the sheer awesome blessing that He continues to unwrap in our lives. At 1500 today, we showed up at the Imaging Center of Warner Robins for our second ultrasound that we have so longed for. It was still a nervous wait in the waiting room, for we were still praying, hoping, and seeking that confirmation that all is still well for the two embryos that we transferred back in Jul. We've been hearing heartbeat(s) on the doppler for weeks now, but only an ultrasound would show for sure if we still had our little Twinz on board. So after a 30 minute wait (which seemed like an eternity), we were called back. Angela was our ultrasound tech...very sweet and personable, she was excited about the prospect of seeing twins. And from the moment the ultrasound probe was placed on Gena's tummy, it was clear that our miracles were still there. And for the next 20 minutes, our eyes, hearts, and minds were filled with elation as we beheld those two little babies. Wiggling around, they were just beautiful. Little arms, little legs; a beautiful spine and a little nose; even a hand that waved "Hi" to the camera...WOW...talk about simple amazement. We were both just overcome with emotions far beyond words. And our little twangels measured in between 14-15 weeks old, which is right on schedule. With a free dinner on the line, we asked Angela to take a guess based on what she saw...and her prediction is a surprise :-). We'll be able to find out in 6 more weeks for sure, so we'll see how she did :-) and then will be happy to share our news. We left there on cloud-million, with pictures of our angels in hand. Below is a couple of their best shots. What a day...Tutt-Twinz are on the way :-)

12w4d: Meet Dr. Shirley

Today was a day of hope and reservation; the true hope that our new doctor would be great and the reservation that our decision to change may not have been the right one.  The waiting room and entire doctor's office was very nice, and we waited the standard 45+ minutes that you often do at the doctor's office these days to finally be called back.   After the normal weight and initial chart check with the nurse staff, Dr. Victoria Shirley came in to meet us.  She was a vibrant and personable doctor, eager to meet with us and talk about the current status and our plan ahead.  After asking some initial questions and discussing the basics of what the remainder of our pregnancy would hold as far as appointment and the like, she used the doppler to listen for our little angels (and she was definitely excited for us that we were having twins!)  She found the first right away, and the second gave her the same "trouble" (fetal finicky, we call it) that that little angel gives us when we use our doppler....but nonetheless, two heartbeats it was, with one measuring in at 155bpm and the other at 145bpm (both very good heartrates.)  It is such a cool and amazing sound to hear their little hearts just beating away for God.  And after listening, she asked us about our prior ultrasound, which opened the door for us to share our difficulties with getting that second ultrasound that Shady Grove wanted done at our old OB office....and she didn't hesitate to say that she wanted to get another one for us.  While that wasn't our goal of switching doctors, it sure was awesome to see that she truly cared about our concerns and valued our inputs and questions.  So even though it's a little later than it would have been, we'll be able to get that second ultrasound so we can see how the two little plums (their approximate size at this point) are doing.  And to top it off, she gave us both a big (and unexpected) hug as we concluded our appointment...which was truly genuine and awesome....while saying that we were going to have a lot of fun delivering our twins!  

We left the office elated with Dr. Shirley and the overall care we got...truly feeling valued in a way that made our unique circumstance understood and focused on rather than molded into whatever normal patients other clinics see.  We are off to a great start with her, and feel that our decision to change OB doctors was a great choice.  So we should have that second ultrasound appointment in a week or so, which will allow us to see our babies :-)  

We're ever-excited about the road ahead, and truly glad to be on board with Dr. Shirley.

 

10w6d: Doctor Swap

We've hit a bit of a rough spot in our care that has us seeking to change our doctor.  As part of the normal protocol for IVF at Shady Grove, they like to do an early ultrasound (like the one we did at 6 weeks) to confirm pregnancy and then another at 8 weeks or so to make sure everything is still progressing along well.  With the doctor's order in hand, we asked our local clinic for the second ultrasound.  Their first answer was that our insurance company will only cover two ultrasounds (the 6-8 week one and the second normal one at 20-24 weeks).  We didn't like the answer, but initially said okay.  We tried to have our nurse at Shady Grove talk to the local clinic to justify it, but they wouldn't budge.  So we then decided that we'd just pay for it out of pocket; to which they changed their story and said that they just don't do that (the extra ultrasound.)  So instead of treating us as a unique case (and they sure don't see twins every day), they felt it was more important to be "right" and "win" whatever "battle" was out there.  It left us wondering where the patient care really was and if they were at all focused on the wishes and desires of both the patient and our unique case.  And while we don't have many options for OB care is the little podunk town, there are a few.  So we talked and prayed about it and put in the request with our insurance company to switch doctors.  There are some friends of Chad's that recently had twins and used a different OB doctor, so that is who we are requesting.  It's not ideal to have to change doctors because our current OB knows our entire story; but the lack of genuine consideration and focused care that the nursing staff at the office was giving to us made it a virtual necessity to seek care elsewhere.    Our new referral got approved, and we are awaiting the new doctor's office review of our records that our old clinic faxed over so that we can get an initial appointment with them.  We are hopeful for better care; and if we are able to get that second early ultrasound, that would be a bonus for us.  

10w4d: HEARTBEATS!

"Make a joyful noise unto the LORD..." is what Psalm 98 says...and that is exactly what we heard our little babies doing today. Gena purchased a doppler on the internet, which gives us an external ear into her belly to hear those little twangles (twin angels) hearts beating away. While we were able to see their little hearts just beating away during our first ultrasound, they usually aren't audible/detectable with a doppler until week 10-12. So Gena did a "trial" listen today, and successfully found those little two. What a surreal and awesome and amazing feeling it was to hear the sound of their HEARTBEATS!! Easily distinguishable from ours, they rock along at a pace of 150-170 beats per minute. It's mindboggling when you think about the fact that while they are only the size of a prune and not even two inches in length, their heartbeat is so easy to distinguish. And it's been quite an addicting evening activity for us to listen to them...the doppler brings both peace of mind in being able to know that their little tickers are still beating away for Jesus and a chance to stay extra connected to our little angels :-) Because there is such a long time between the early ultrasounds and the 20-weeker, the doppler is the interim lifesaver for peace of mind. I don't think we've ever treasured the sound of a heartbeat more than we have since we first heard our babies'...it literally is music to our ears. And since the presence of a heartbeat is a big sign of good progression, we are filled with even more hope that this cycle is going to fill our arms in the way we have for so many years dreamed and hoped and prayed He would:-)