Checking In

Just wanted to check in and let everyone know how we are doing. Of course this is a loaded question as there are too many answers :-)....we are happy, tired, frustrated, excited, overwhelmed, amazed, blessed and every other thought, feeling and emotions you can throw in the mix. When Mom T was here I remember her asking me if the early days/weeks felt far away and at that point even though it was just a few short weeks ago they really didn't feel that far removed from them but now I do...I think back to those first few weeks and they feel like they were several months ago not just 2 and I think about how much the babies have grown and changed since then and I am just amazed. They grow and change so much everyday. Big changes for us...
Evan is no longer being swaddled...he is completely weaned from it. We tried Taryn w/o it as well and she did great for 2 weeks and then all of a sudden she seemed to need it again so she is still being swaddled for bed and naps. I was still swaddling Evan for naps until today and he did great w/o it (however, the word "great" is relative when speaking of Evan and naps in the same sentence).
My little piggies went from eating 5 oz at bed time to 9 oz practically overnight. Though I think they were going through a growth spurt. I have used this extra milk as a way to help break Taryn of her "dessert" habit. I decided if she wanted to eat her bedtime bottle in two sessions that was fine but we would give her round 1 before bath and round 2 after her bath and it has worked like a charm...so I basically will give her 3-4 ounces right before we give her a bath and save the rest, usually about another 4-5 ounces, for after she is all clean, dressed and swaddled. She hasn't asked for "dessert" since...YIPPEE!!!!! Although she is a girl after my own heart, that was not a habit I wanted to keep up with :-)
Changes to bedtime routine...now that the twins are 3 months old they get a story and prayer before bed. We used to just give them their bottles in the living room and then put them down. However, now we go into the nursery and sit as a family in the glider (good thing I bought a double glider) and we feed the babies together, Daddy reads a story, and we say prayers, turn on the lullabies, kiss them goodnight and put them to bed. Recently we have been reading Veggie Tales Bible Stories but since we have completed all the stories in this book we decided to expand our reading selection and just tonight read a new book "Mom Hugs" well I don't think Chad was too thrilled w/ the title of this book because as he was reading it everywhere the word "mom" was he replaced w/ "dad" LOL. Gotta love the guy :-)
Naps...I know I have talked about this before and this is where the frustration comes in...I do try to remind myself how far we have come in just a few weeks to make myself feel better but the whole nap time thing continues to be frustrating to me. The good: they are now napping in their cribs consistently and they go down easily w/ no crying...I have finally learned their signals and can usually decipher when they are fussy because they are tired or if it might be something else. Putting them down at the right time is key for them going down easy w/o a fight where the problem comes in is the duration of their naps specifically Evan. Taryn has done great...she will usually give me a couple 1+ hr naps a day sometimes 2+ hrs...Evan on the other hand I think he has an internal alarm clock that wakes him at the 30 min mark. Sometimes I can get him to sleep 1 hr but I usually have to soothe him back to sleep at the 30 min mark. I would not be so bothered by this but there are 2 huge issues...1.) them being on completely different sleep cycles makes my day very long and difficult 2.) They are so grumpy when they don't get adequate sleep. So it is not like if Evan refuses his naps I can just get him up and play w/ him because the fact is he wont play...he will cry and want to be held. Every place I turn says to get them on the same schedule and when one wakes, wake the other. HA HA that is a lot easier said then done because if Taryn needs to take a 2 hour nap believe me everyone around needs her to take a 2 hr nap as well. She is so clingy when she is tired...so by waking her up I now not only have one over tired cranky baby but I have 2...and when you are by yourself that is no fun. The problem w/ having them on opposite schedules is that there is no break it is a constant circle of putting one baby down and the other getting up...feed, play, sleep and do it over and over and over again...kind of like the movie "Groundhog Day" except I repeat my day in 2 hour cycles instead of 24 hours. And as much as I love those little munchkins it gets exhausting. Honestly more then just the monotony of repeating the same task over and over I feel like the babies are getting cheated as well because this really leaves very little time for play time...and I just worry that they are going to be so behind developmentally because I don't have adequate time to sit on the floor w/ them and do tummy time or practice sitting or playing and just interacting w/ them. I know everyone is going to say "oh, don't worry, they will get there" and yes, I know they will eventually but really, what mom doesn't worry...I think it comes w/ the territory :-) no matter what I am always going to think and feel that I could be doing things better then I am. I just have to be able to go to bed at night and feel like I did the best I could that day and some days it is hard to feel that way because I am so physically and mentally drained.
I hope I don't sound too negative...that really isn't my point...it is just a hard stage right now and I think a lot of it could be solved by a solid schedule and adequate naps but I don't think they are quite there yet so we will continue working w/ them until they get there but I do look so forward to the day when I can implement a schedule that will actually work for them and me :-).

On a more positive note I will share my favorite moments so far....I love their smiles...those little smiles are what gets me through everyday. The other day Taryn was taking one of her marathon naps like the good little girl that she is...so I went in to check on her (after 2 hours I start to worry a bit)...I walked in the room and quietly walked over to the pack-n-play (that is where Taryn naps as I have them separated for naps right now so they don't wake each other) and leaned over to get a good look at her...she slightly opened her eyes and flashed me this huge smile and then closed her eyes...she opened them again and smiled again...she did this 3 or 4 times and it was just so sweet...I love it when she wakes up like that. And then last weekend I was tired and wanted to nap when the babies napped but because I can never trust that they will go down for very long I wasn't too confident that I would get much sleep so I decided to bring Evan to our bed w/ me and put Taryn in the pack n play as I always have better luck w/ them sleeping if we are with them. So I laid Evan on the bed next to me and rubbed his little head and belly until he fell asleep....I kept opening my eyes to check on him and he was just laying their so peaceful and then I would see him open his eyes to make sure I was still there and once he confirmed I hadn't left him he would go back to sleep...so cute, just checking on Mom making sure she didn't leave him :-). But really my favorite Evan moments so far are when Chad is playing w/ him....Chad can make these faces at him that just delight him to no end and he laughs as best as a 3 month old can laugh and it is just too cute. I have yet to make him laugh :-( but that's OK it is so fun to see how they respond to Chad...he is such a great Dad to them.
Other positives worth mentioning. Taryn has slept completely through the night from 7:00-6/6:30 12 of the last 14 nights...not a peep out of her all night...Way to go Taryn. And for the past 2 nights after we put the babies in their cribs after prayers...they have gone right to sleep...no paci checks or additional soothing...that is huge...usually we are in there at least once replacing paci's or something...so they have done great and they both slept completely through the night for the second time last night...Chad and I hope they repeat tonight that would make it the first time they both did it on the same night 2 nights in a row...lets hope :). Actually the fact that they sleep so well at night is probably why their day sleep issues confuse me :-) I think I have too high of expectation for them. They are doing great and are very good babies...I have very little room to complain and I know it...so I will shut up now LOL :-)